


There Are much Worse Things To Be Than In Love

by AaronCole0902



Series: Clumsy and Awkward is the New Smooth and Sexy [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Best Friends, Childhood Friends, F/F, F/M, First Kiss, First Relationship, Friends to Lovers, Gay Male Character, Gen, Getting Together, M/M, Not Beta Read, Teen Romance, Tsukishima Kei & Yamaguchi Tadashi Friendship, Tsukishima Kei is Bad at Feelings, We Die Like Men, Yamaguchi Tadashi's Freckles, childhood bullying, second hand embarrassment, teenagers in love, wlw Yachi, yacht and Yamaguchi have gay bonding time
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-15
Updated: 2020-06-15
Packaged: 2021-03-04 03:27:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,132
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24726733
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AaronCole0902/pseuds/AaronCole0902
Summary: The one where Tsukishima and Yamaguchi finally get together.
Relationships: Tsukishima Kei/Yamaguchi Tadashi
Series: Clumsy and Awkward is the New Smooth and Sexy [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1787836
Comments: 13
Kudos: 159





	There Are much Worse Things To Be Than In Love

**Author's Note:**

> Hey everyone! This is just a little one shot that was bouncing around in my brain after rewatching Haikyu. I love Tsukishima nd Yamaguchi's dynamic and knew I needed to write something about it. :)

“So you have a crush on him?” Yachi poked yamaguchi’s freckles pointedly, giving him a teasing smile. He pushed her hand away gently, fighting off a blush with furrowed brows.

“I mean-it’s, I just-” he smacked his cheeks lightly, shaking off his nerves, “yeah. I do. But I don’t really know what I’m supposed to do about it, ya know?” He definitely didn’t want to lose his best friend or make things awkward between them. Especially when they spent so much time together between their friendship, sleepovers and the volleyball club.

It would be really inconvenient if they ended up becoming distant and there was always the chance he’d never want to talk to him again. He’d never explicitly heard Tsukishima ever make fun of someone for being gay-maybe annoying or short or rude, but not gay.

It wasn’t like Yamaguchi ever really went out of his way to hide he was gay. He’d always just been himself around Tsukki and he’d never teased him for anything of the sort. He’d never had a girlfriend, he had a little rainbow pin on his bag and had been known to paint his nails. None of that necessarily meant he was gay, but if Tsukki had really been worried about something like that he probably would have picked it up by now.

“Hm. Well, uh you’re his best friend, right? Is he gay? Or bi or something? Ever been in a relationship?” she pushed her hair behind her ear, tilting her head sweetly.

“Honestly, I really don’t know,” he rubbed the back of his neck absentmindedly, “he’s never been in a relationship. He’s kind of reserved though. He definitely scoffs at PDA and stuff, but he’s never really paid attention to anyone like that that I know of. We’ve never even talked about it before. Well- actually, one of the girls from our middle school did ask him out once and he turned her down. He said he didn’t like her and she shouldn’t waste her time.” He laughed nervously at that. It had been brutal to watch.

She had been so excited to ask him, even going as far as to grab his wrist gently and smile at him. If Yamaguchi had been into girls, he’d probably have swooned at that alone. But Tsukki had barely blinked at the contact, before pulling his hand back and delivering the bad news. She walked away on the verge of tears.

Yamaguchi had almost gone to comfort her, but Tsukki had grabbed his sweater sleeve and pulled him in the opposite direction before he’d gotten the chance.

That had been the first time Tsukki had ever willingly made physical contact with Yamaguchi, come to think of it. Yamaguchi had always been the one to grab the corner of his jacket or grab his hand to lead him along. Tsukki had just put up with it till that point.

Despite how selfish it was, that was one of Yamaguchi’s favorite childhood memories. Contact like that from Tsukki was rare and it was a sign of trust. He wasn’t so oblivious to his friend’s behavior to brush that off.

“Well, maybe you should subtly try and bring it up!” She smiled brightly.

The thought of trying to have a conversation about his relationship preferences made Yamaguchi want to throw up. At the sight of his distress, Yachi’s nose twitched.

“Okay, okay I guess that’s probably a little bold for you. I know! I could try and bring it up after practice tomorrow or something! And you won’t have to ask him; I can ask it as like a group thing ya know?” she suggested.

“I guess that might work. He probably won’t engage in the conversation unless I actively try to include him, but it’s worth a shot I guess.” Despite the positivity in his voice, he wrapped his arms around his knees, leaving forward and letting out a sigh.

“Hey, no, no being sad. What’s wrong? This is a good plan.” Yachi rested her hand on his shoulder reassuringly.

“What if he turns me down like that girl from middle school? I don’t think I’m strong enough for that. Why can’t things just stay like they are now? I mean, he’s happy being friends with me just like this. I don’t wanna screw this up..” _because who would I have without him? Could I really survive that heartbreak? Maybe if it was for him but.._

“You know what Yams,” Yachi moved her hand from his shoulder to rub her hands together in an attempt to self soothe, “when I told Kiyoko that I had a crush on her and she turned me down, I really thought I might die. I genuinely felt like my first real bond with the team, the person who chose me to take her place and saw my potential, was destroyed.” He remembered how hard she’d crushed on Kiyoko from day one. It was all she talked about for a while and she and Yamaguchi had bonded over their one sided crushes. It had been the true start of their friendship. There was something about that subtle pining gay energy that really drew the two together.

“The reasons she turned me down were all valid, the age difference, the leadership role, college and the fact she didn’t return my feelings.. But at the time, in that moment I felt so crushed, but now we’ve worked things out and we’re friends again, even though she's away at college. It hurts sometimes, but we had a strong enough bond in the first place to want to make it work.” He remembered that night she’d called him crying, meeting her at the station between their houses to walk with her and calm her down. She had looked really broken then.

But now, she _glowed. _There was a sparkle in her eye that wasn’t there before she had been rejected. It was like clarity and the acknowledgement of her own strength. Picking herself back up after that and facing Kiyoko everyday had been a huge challenge and she’d grown from that.__

_She looked strong in a way Tadashi hoped to one day replicate._

“What I’m trying to say, is if he’s really your best friend, even if he doesn’t return your feelings and even though he’s not really the type to express himself well or handle emotions, he’ll make an effort to make things work and sort it out with you. If he can’t do that, then maybe you need better friends.” She spoke so confidently, he almost flinched, blinking in realization.

_Was he confident enough in their friendship to trust Tsukki to move out of his comfort zone and be emotionally vulnerable?_

They’d been friends for years. Tsukki had saved him from bullying, let him hang around and introduced him to volleyball. He’d made him more confident and gave him a safe space to be himself. He’d given him a second home when his own had been in pieces. He trusted Tsukki with his life. Could he say the same for him? Did Tsukki trust him like that?

He wasn’t ever one to really talk about his feelings or be overly appreciative. But in his own way, Yamaguchi was sure he had his trust. He’d listened to him talk about dinosaurs and the different kinds of sharks he could name, gone to museums with him. He’d let him stay at his house and played video games with him. After his older brother had that breakdown, Yamaguchi had seen him cry for the first time and been around for his personality shift after that.

Even when he’d closed himself off so much from the world and his family after that, Yamaguchi had still been allowed to stay close. He couldn’t really picture Tsukishima sharing any of that with anyone else. _At least not willingly._

Maybe it was selfish, but that put a smile on his face. He was tsukki’s one exception. Even if it was strictly platonic on Tsukki’s part, it still made his stomach fill with butterflies.

“Yach, you’re really great, you know that right?” He gave her his widest smile, laughing slightly when she blushed and rolled back onto her back in embarrassment.

“Shut uppp. I’m just telling the truth okay? You’ve become one of my best friends and I just want to make sure you know how amazing and worthy you are of love, Yams.”

He really didn’t want to cry. He’d prided himself in having been cry-free for the past month. (He’d always felt like such a crybaby). But something about that, being spoken so honestly and with the pure intentions, really got to him. It wasn’t something she had said to manipulate him. She just said it because she believed it to be true.

It was probably the first time someone had ever said that out loud to him.

He’d felt it sometimes when Tsukki would wait for him, compliment him in his own way or bring him lunch when his mother made too much the night before. He just hadn’t heard it out loud and for some reason it was reverberating in his head, bouncing around his insecurities before settling in his chest.

_And he was crying._

Yachi was nearly screeching, saying she was sorry and lifting him up from the ground while he rubbed his eyes roughly, trying to hold himself together.

“I’m so sorry Yams! I didn’t think you would react so badly to that! Do you need some water? A hug-” both of them were too busy reassuring the other that they didn’t notice Tsukishima round the corner to meet them.

“Oi.” he narrowed his eyes threateningly at Yachi, moving in to stand beside his best friend and instinctively, Yachi backed up. She’d never been really afraid of Tsukishima, sure he was tall and intimidating, but she’d never seen a look like that from him.

_That’s a threat._

At the loss of her warmth and the sound of Tsukki’s voice Yamaguchi sniffled, finally getting control of himself, shaking his head slightly. Tsuki held his water bottle in front of him wordlessly, and he grabbed it with a slight blush. He was so embarrassed he nearly forgot how the situation looked to Tsuki if he had walked up with his headphones in.

It had probably looked like Yachi had made him cry on purpose. It probably looked really similar to the bullying he used to deal with when they were younger and that likely sparked Tsukishima’s protective nature towards Yamaguchi.

“Didn’t know you guys were close outside of practice.” He blinked slowly, eyes watching Yachi closely. She could feel him reading her, waiting time pounce without some insult she’d probably never get out of her head if it left his lips.

There was something about Tsukishima’s insults that made them sharper than anyone else’s. Honestly, it was probably the fact that Tsukishima knew exactly how to find insecurities and use them against someone. Despite his seemingly lack of social skills, he could read people incredibly well. He hit them where it hurt. _Brutally honest._

Thankfully, he didn’t need to open his mouth because Yamaguchi almost had a heart attack trying to fix the whole situation.

“Oi, oi, Tsukki it’s okay! She wasn’t bullying me I promise! She just said something so nice it made me cry.” He had his fingers splayed out in front of him, letting out a nervous laugh.

“Something so nice it made you.. cry.” He said dryly, flipping his gaze from his best friend to Yachi, trying to figure out if he was telling the truth or not.

“It’s true! I just complimented him and he combusted I swear!” Yachi sweat dropped, rolling back and forth on her heels, still feeling the weight of his glare.

“Hn. Whatever. You coming?” He turned, not sparing her another glance, gripping the shoulder of his bag, waiting for Yamaguchi to follow him so they could walk home together.

Yamaguchi smiled after his friend and nodded.

“Yeah one second, I’m coming.” He threw his own bag over his shoulder, but before going with Tsukki like normal, he turned back to Yachi who was watching Tsukishima closely as he waited.

“Thanks for everything, Hitoka.” He then proceeded to give her one of his best hugs, the kind where he picked her up slightly and swung her around just enough to make her laugh before setting her back down gently and making his way towards Tsukki.

“See ya later dashi!!” She smiled, calling out after him before grabbing her things and heading in the opposite direction, form slowly fading from view.

* * *

“Thanks for coming to my rescue, even if it wasn’t needed Tsukki.” He gently bumped his friends shoulder, and honest smile lighting up his face. Tsukishima looked down at him, the intimidating glare from moments before already gone.

“Didn’t think I’d need to do that anymore. Getting kind of old, don’t you think?” He let the corner of his mouth lift, slipping back into his usual behavior and Tadashi rolled his eyes.

“Don’t worry. I’ve picked up enough of your snark to bite back after all these years. Too bad you haven’t picked up any of my social skills.” He copied his friend's smirk, though a little softer and less practiced. Something sparked in Tsukishima’s eyes for a moment, incredibly brief, but Yamaguchi caught it. _He was having fun._

“Just because I don’t use them doesn’t mean I didn’t pick them up, freckles.” They turned the corner and Yams was practically glowing.

“Oh yeah? Prove it. Let’s see these amazing social skills you’ve picked up from me.” He teased.

In an incredibly disturbing but equally fascinating and impressive way, Tsukishima’s whole being shifted; it was like a switch flipped.

His shoulders moved back, slouch gone. He removed his hands from his jacket pockets and turned to face Tadashi. The scariest part was what he managed to do with his face. The usual crease around his brows smoothed out and a soft smile found its way to his lips. His eyes felt more open, softer somehow and kinder.

“Great to see you, Tadashi-Kun. How was your day?” He gave a closed-eyed smile and a hand gesture that was open and friendly. It was like time froze.

The second Yamaguchi blinked, the switch was turned off and everything slipped back into place effortlessly. Tsukishima didn’t take note of his friend's shocked demeanor, much too pleased with himself at his performance. He kept walking, as if it had never happened at all.

Yamaguchi’s brain was completely fried. Any attempt at walking was shut down. His brain was working one hundred percent on trying not to simultaneously combust at whatever otherworldly experience he’d just had.

_What the fuck. What the actual living fuck._

There was a lot for him to unpack in the 0.5 seconds he had before Tsukki got annoyed he wasn’t following and inevitably stopped to wait for him with a disgruntled look.

First, the butterflies he was currently sporting in his stomach nearly made him puke. That had been a scene out of a really cheesy doujin or something. The smile had been all wrong on Tsukki’s face, but it had looked so good he couldn’t fight off the blush that creeped across his skin.

Second, _Tadashi-Kun_. He could count on one hand the amount of times Tsukishima had called him by his given name. Not once had he ever added anything like “kun” to the end. It was so out of character. So why was he blushing so hard about it? Why had hearing that-just a stupid honorific to his given name-why did that have him so stunned?

Third, somehow Tsukki had made himself warmer. When he did that, a new energy just radiated off of him. It had nearly made him swoon. How was he supposed to function after seeing this? Who would ever believe it happened, even as a joke?

“Did my little performance break you? Come on. I think my mom’s making your favorite tonight.” Tsukki waited while Yamaguchi pulled himself from his stupor, forcing himself to go back through the motions for controlling his physical body.

Jeez, Tsukki nearly made him fucking astral project for a minute. _All over some stupid act._

In hindsight, it wasn’t right-that just wasn’t Tsukki and as much as it made him swoon- he was glad he wasn’t like that all the time.

He much preferred his calming presence. The rare smiles he got from him were all the more precious coming from his unbothered demeanor. It was cute to see once, but he was glad his friend was back to normal.

“Coming.” He smiled, jogging to catch up. He fell into place effortlessly, sliding right next to his friend, a small smile still lingering on his lips.

* * *

“I didn’t know you were close with Yachi.”

There was no malice in his tone. There was no shift in his facial features or body language that made it seem like he felt any type of way about it.

But for some reason, the question almost felt like a jab.

“Yeah, hah, we only became really good friends over the past few months. I think you’d really like her too, if you hung out with her outside of practice. She’s pretty different when she’s not stressed about the team stuff.” He smiled fondly, thinking of her newly developed positive attitude.

“Is she your girlfriend or something?”

Something changed. Yamaguchi wasn't quite sure what jealousy looked like on Tsukishima. He’d always been so good at smothering it in insults and feigning disinterest that it had never been clear before.

It was the smallest of details, but he’d been watching Tsukki so closely before, it didn’t matter.

 _Tsukki was jealous._ The only problem was, he didn’t know which kind. Was he jealous that Yamaguchi had other fiends? Or was he jealous that Yachi and him could be a potential couple?

“No, definitely not. She’s an amazing person, but she’s not really my uh, my type?” he decided not to push on the jealousy too much, not wanting to set a disgruntled tone for the night, choosing instead to act oblivious to his friend’s behavior.

“She’s pretty,” Yamaguchi turned to his friend in shock. _When had he ever called a girl pretty before? Or even started talking about relationships in any capacity? Did he like Yachi? This was going to make everything so much harder._

“-and top of her class. She likes volleyball too. That’s not your type?” Tsukki leans his head back, giving his friend a look from the side. Yamaguchi can’t quite put his finger on it, but it feels like confusion and jealousy and something else.This was kind of a tough situation. Because really, all those things were his type. Pretty, smart, into volleyball. Those things were the very tip of the iceberg that was Tsukishima in this mental gymnastics metaphor.

On the other hand, was he really going to come out right now? It felt a little forced, but not necessarily uncomfortable. He trusted Tsukki, he just wasn’t expecting things to go that way before their sleepover. It was normally a quiet walk back to Tsukki’s place, light chatting about their days or teasing about something, helping his mom with dinner and then escaping to his room to play videogames or just laze around his room.

So, he wasn’t really prepared for any type of emotional depth tonight (he really preferred at least a few hours' notice on anything that would give him anxiety, but he’d been waiting for the time to tell his friend anyway, right?).

“Yeah. I mean, pretty, volleyball, smart-that all sounds great to me, but there’s just one key thing there that doesn’t really click for me..,” no matter how much he trusted his best friend, looking him in the eyes right now was just too much; he’d settle for watching his sneakers kick up dust, _“i’m gay.”_

_I’m gay. I’m also in love with you and I think I have been for a really long time. So no, Yachi isn’t my type in the slightest. And now you’re gonna look at me weird and I’ve ruined everything._

“Oh,” Tsukishima was just a little bit quieter. Whatever jealousy had been stirring up dissipated instantly, “you never said anything.”

It wasn’t an insult, wasn’t a jab, just an observation. He wasn’t wrong, but it just wasn’t sitting right with him for some reason. No he’d never said anything, but neither had Tsukishima either. He didn’t want to be catching any bitterness if it came down to it. It hadn’t been a secret; he just never bothered to ask.

~~_Getting a little defensive, Tadashi._ ~~

“You never asked. It’s not like we talk about that kind of stuff anyway.” he crossed his arms, suppressing a sigh he felt bubbling on his lips.

“I guess we don’t. It never really seemed important,” Tsukki dug his hands deeper into his pockets, subtly pushing his shoulders to his ears in discomfort and Yamaguchi swore he saw a blush start at the tip of his ears.

He’s embarrassed. _But he’s trying, I think._ He wants to -maybe, but he’s just not used to dealing with feelings so directly.

Tsukishima’s voice pulled him from his thoughts abruptly.

“Did you want to talk about stuff like that?” He scrunched his nose, turning away slightly to avoid Yamaguchi’s sharp gaze.

_Gwahh he looks so cute blushing. How was he supposed to hold a conversation about their feelings when everything he’d ever felt was staring him in the face?_

“Hmm. It kinda seems like you want to, Tsukki.” he smiled, teasing him slightly. Tsukishima narrowed his eyes, glaring at him harshly. _Alright, alright. I’ll lighten up on the teasing. He’s obviously miles out of his comfort zone._

“Alright, fine. I guess I can talk about it. An eye for an eye. I go first ,but then you have to tell me what your type is. It’s only fair.” He didn't respond, but Yamaguchi figured all his current focus and energy was going into not simultaneously combusting at the topic of conversation.

“I guess I like pretty boys. Taller than me is nice, but not a deal breaker if they aren't…” he rubbed his hands together nervously, fighting off a blush. How was he supposed to tell him what he liked when it would be so easy to see everything was about him? Or should he just use this as an opportunity to tell him how he really felt?

“...Smart and athletic are my type too. Blondes usually. If Yachi was a boy, she’d really have me wrapped around her finger I guess, heh..umm,” what else was he supposed to say here? _I like tall blondes who act all tough on the outside, but are just really sweet and gentle on the inside. Middle blockers. Glasses. Blondes. Best friends. Dinosaur enthusiasts. Legend of Zelda experts._

“That’s it. That’s my type. Now your turn. Spill your guts, dinosaur.” He did his best to swallow his anxiety. He didn’t even know if Tsukishima was into guys. What face was he going to make if he said something like tall hot gingers with big boobs or something?? Was he supposed to nod in approval? Or just smile? Or was he supposed to act a little grossed out? Women didn’t gross him out, but what would hide how he was really going to feel about a confession like that?

Yamaguchi took a deep breath and stared intently at his friend, praying his face didn’t give away how hopeful he was. Tsukishima opened his mouth and pulled to a stop.

A stop right in front of his apartment door. _Of fucking course._

“Come on. Mom’s expecting help with dinner.” Tsukishima ignored the situation altogether, reaching for the door handle.

No. Absolutely not. Yamaguchi was not about to sit here and spill his guts, only to have Tsukki bail on him emotionally. Maybe he’d have let it go a few years ago, even a year ago, but he wasn’t that person anymore. A lot had changed and he deserved basic respect.

“No way. Absolutely not!” Yamguchi reached forward and grabbed the taller boy’s wrist tightly, preventing him from opening the door.

“-you do not get to avoid a conversation you wanted to start. I told you even though I was embarrassed. I just came out! You don’t get to, to not share after I had to. You promised.” He wasn’t quite yelling, but it was definitely louder than the soft reserved tones he normally projected.

Tsukki’s eyes widened slightly at his tone, a little taken aback at his assertiveness. He pursed his lips and Yamaguchi released his grip on his wrist, but maintained his serious look.

“Fine. After dinner. I promise we’ll talk. Let’s just get this over with first, alright?” He rolled his eyes and the front door gave that familiar squeak before they were greeted by his mother beckoning them to the kitchen.

Dinner was awkward, even though it shouldn’t have been. It may have all just been in his head, but Yamaguchi was thinking too hard about the impending conversation. Could he trust himself not to cry if it came down to it? What if Tsukishima wasn’t even into anybody? Would that be better or worse? Then he felt selfish, because whatever Tsukki felt were his own feelings and he was entitled to them and he shouldn’t feel bad either way.

After all the reeling, he heard Yachi’s voice in the back of his mind. _What if he likes you back?_

He’d never let himself really consider it before. He didn’t want to get his own hopes up, but what if by some crazy chance he did like him back? What was he supposed to do then? Date? Or were they supposed to go on dates first before actually dating? Did their entire friendship not count as dates if they both felt the same way? Why was his heart beating so fast?

He nearly choked on his rice, Mrs. Tsukishima pushed his glass of water towards him.

“Slow down, Yamaguchi sweetheart. Chew your food. I can feel you thinking too much from the other side of the table.” He almost choked again at that, a blush blossoming across his face. He laughed a little to humor her and then took her advice, took a deep breath and focused on his meal.

He didn’t look up till he was done and had placed his dish in the washer.

* * *

In Tsukishima’s room, they both instantly changed into their pajamas, hanging their uniforms up loosely.

Tsukki was clad in a faded jurassic park shirt and Dragon Ball Z pajama pants. The shirt was a little too small, especially now that he had put on a little extra muscle from volleyball and it tended to ride up just a little bit. The pants had always been too short, usually riding up his calves and it was almost funny.

He looked so cute. It was no wonder he had fallen so hard. He just looked so cozy like that too.

Tadashi’s signature sleepover look was a pair of his old drawstring shorts and one of Tsukki’s old sweaters. The sleeves had always been too long for him, but he liked it better that way. Wearing Tsukki’s clothes was a guilty pleasure of his. He always felt so small and cute, but protected at the same time. The shorts were a pair he’d had for years, though he figured he’d have to retire them soon. He hadn’t gotten much broader over the past couple years, but the drills from practice had done his thighs well and he’d probably need a bigger size soon.

Maybe Tsukki had an old pair around here somewhere he could steal…

Instead of ogling his best friend any longer, he plopped himself beside him on the bed, grabbing one of Tsukki’s dinosaur plushies and holding it close, legs crossed in anticipation.

Tsukishima just blinked at him, looking him up and down once, dreading the elephant in the room.

“Alright Tsukki. Hit me with it.” Yamaguchi smiled brightly, swaying back and forth lightly. He could at least pretend he wasn't so incredibly anxious he could feel his stomach turning over.

Tsukishima pulled his legs to his chest, draping his arms over his legs loosely. Strategically, he avoided Tadashi’s gaze, instead choosing to stare at the shark poster across from the bed.

Absentmindedly, Yamaguchi pulled his hair back loosely, tying it off with an elastic (something Yachi had recommended since he’d been avoiding the barbers. The elastic had been hers, pink and sparkly, but Tadashi would have been lying if he’d said it wasn’t cute.)

The sudden movement drew Tsukki’s attention and his golden eyes watched intently as Tadashi ran his fingers through his hair gently, pulling it back with practiced ease.

He swallowed before speaking.

“I don’t think I have type really,” he pushed his glasses up gently, refocusing, “but I guess, I like you too.” He blinked and Yamaguchi visibly spazzed.

“Pfft, I never said I like you! Where would you get that Idea! I just-”

“Tadashi. You just told me your type was tall, blonde, athletic, and smart. Then you blushed and looked away. You can’t tell me that wasn’t a confession.” His posture loosened up a little, letting his legs relax and giving his eyes a roll.

“I mean- that’s not.. Okay yeah I like you. Sorry.”

“Sorry? Did not just hear me say I like you too?”

“You-oh my gosh! You totally did and I just-” Yamaguchi slapped his cheeks gently, shaking his head in disbelief.

_What the fuck had just happened? That conversation lasted what? Five seconds? And he hadn’t even been the one to confess! Tsukishima had confessed to him!_

“You really like me, huh?” Kei tilted his head slightly in disbelief and Yamaguchi had to fight back a scoff.

“Of course I like you,” Tadashi started, “that’s what Yachi and I were talking about before you walked up to us today.”

“So what about that made you cry? Did you think I would hurt you because of it?” Kei actually looked a little hurt at the insinuation and Yamaguchi visibly paled.

“No, no, you’d never hurt me intentionally like that! I know that! We had just been talking about it, how I wasn’t sure if you liked me back and eventually we kept talking and she told me..” he swallowed in embarrassment, “she told me I was deserving of love, no matter how you felt about me.” he trailed off.

“Did you really think you didn’t deserve that?” Kei asked honestly. Tsukishima Kei was certain Yamaguchi Tadashi deserved everything he wanted in life.

“I mean, I know I do, I just..” he looked away for a minute, trying to find the words, “you know how my parents were growing up, even now I guess. It’s just not something I’m used to. Made me cry a little bit. I guess even after all these years i'm still a crybaby, huh?” He gave a watery smile, trying his best to push down the bubbling embarrassment.

His best friend just told him he reciprocated his feelings and here he was crying because his parents never told him they loved him. _How pathetic._

Tsukishima had moved closer now, sitting across from him, knees touching before he reached his hand across to rest on Yamaguchi’s cheek, gently wiping a tear that threatened to fall down his face.

Neither boy was breathing and both were blushing so hard it burned. Kei didn’t pull his hand back after wiping the tear away with his thumb, just letting his palm rest there, caressing his face gently.

_Holy shit. He’s so close. He likes me back. He’s willingly touching me, my face at that..surely I’m just dreaming? There’s no way this could be real right now._

They didn’t say anything, just stared at each other blinking in surprise, both shocked by the foreign comforting behavior. Golden eyes flickered from his own down to his lips and back up.

_A silent request-_

Yamaguchi took a deep breath and reached his own hand up, gently pulling Tsukki's hand from his cheek, intertwining their fingers loosely.

_**Time to be brave, Tadashi.** _

With his left hand busy holding Tsukki’s, he reached his right up towards him, resting it on his neck, pulling his taller friend down to meet him halfway, pressing his lip against his own.

He didn’t respond at first, but Tadashi gave him a second to gather himself and eventually, he started reacting, moving his lips gently against his own.

Neither of them had experience, but it didn’t matter much.

It didn’t last very long either, only a few seconds and they pulled apart slowly, catching their breath, both red in the face and seeing stars.

Tadashi had thought about kissing Tsukishima all the time. Before practice, anytime Tsukki made a block and got that smirk on his face, when he got back his test results and did that proud little tap on his desk he thought no one noticed. He thought about it late at night and he thought about it when he woke up.

He’d always imagined it would be explosive, like a dam breaking or lightning striking.

He’d never thought it would feel so much like coming home though. It was like making the perfect jump float or the perfect combo attack in Super Smash Bros. It was like the last piece clicking into place.

_It was like he’d never been whole before that moment._

While his mind ran a mile a minute, Tsukishima took a visible breath before tugging the stuffed dino out of his best friend's hands, surprising him before grabbing him by the fabric of his sweater, pulling him back in for another kiss.

_When was the last time Kei had felt so much at once without shutting down or closing himself off? When was the last time he’d trusted anyone or anything this much? What was Yamaguchi Tadashi doing to him?_

This one was a little more like the lightning feeling he’d been expecting. It was definitely more clumsy and his glasses bumped against the bridge of his nose uncomfortably, causing him to squeak in surprise and Tsukishima blushed, apologizing.

Yamaguchi just laughed, reaching up to gently pull his friend’s glasses from his face, setting them carefully on the bedside table before wrapping his hands around Tsukki’s, causing him to release his grip on the sweater.

With newfound confidence and Yachi’s advice in the back of his mind, he pushed Tsukki back a little and pulled himself into his lap, gently placing his friend's hands loosely on his hips.

* * *

Without his glasses, Tsukishima could probably be considered legally blind and even up close it was hard to see, but right there, the only part of his vision that didn’t blur beyond recognition, was Tadashi’s face.

His brown eyes seemed so much deeper this close, with warm undertones and flecks of green. He let his eyes trace across the freckles that dotted his tan skin and tried (and failed) to bite back a dopey smile he knew he’d regret letting the other boy see later.

_Yamaguchi Tadashi is absolutely beautiful._

Their lips met for the third time that night. A little more confident, a little more practiced, but just as meaningful.

Why had he waited so long to tell him? Why had he ever doubted he returned his feelings? There was no one he could ever be closer to, no one he trusted more with his heart.

In all his seventeen years of life, he’d never been so sure of anything.

Tsukishima had never been comfortable sharing his feelings, even with Yamaguchi.

But just as he’d helped him become more confident over the years, Tadashi had helped him become more comfortable being vulnerable.

He was for damn sure vulnerable right now, lips pressed to his childhood best friend's, hands loosely rubbing circles on the skin just at his waistline where his sweater had ridden up after he pulled himself into his lap.

_That had been a much bolder move than he’d ever expected from him really, it had almost been too much, too overwhelming, but his weight was comfortable, thighs and hips resting so perfectly across his lap he wondered how they’d never ended up like that before._

Tsukishima Kei had a list of things he always went back to when he needed something to pull him out of his head. It usually looked something like:  
 _Dinosaurs._  
 _Studying._  
 _Video Games._  
 _Sharks._  
 _Volleyball._

In the past five minutes it had somehow turned into something like:

_Kissing Tadashi._   
_Kissing Tadashi._   
_Kissing Tadashi._   
_Kissing Tadashi._   
_Dinosaurs._

Damn, he really had it bad.

**_But there are much worse things to be than in love._ **

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! If there's good response and a demand I might make this a series of one shots rather than just this piece. It was really fun to write and I hope you all enjoyed it! Let me know what you think in the comments!


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